In addition to announcing Frodus playing, we are happy to announce the rest of the amazing line-up! The show will take place on Saturday, March 21st at the Radio Room (508 East 6th Street) in Austin, Texas, on two stages.ĭJ sets by Team Fabrication and Neil O'Brien from The Van Pelt. The Conglomerate has employed Liam Wilson of the Dillinger Escape Plan to supply bass guitar for this address while Nathan Burke organizes his North-West Contingency.
Austin will be the first of several public forums to address current global conditions forewarned by the FCI in years past. The Frodus Conglomerate International will address the public for the first time in 10 years on Saturday March 21, 2009, at 4:30 pm in Austin, Texas. After weeks of vicious negotiation both parties agreed on a proper course of action. Calls were made, doors were closed and numbers adjusted. The current administration with the assistance of Ben Bernanke, Chairman of the United States Federal Reserve, has reached out to the Frodus Conglomerate International for aid. "2009 has seen the world economy crumble due to the unethical practices of businessmen and corporate oligarchy. We have been working non-stop to create the best possible show and just as we were about to announce the amazing line up we got the the following communique from The Frodus Conglomerate International: We joined forces because we care about good music and want to share our love with you. Lovitt Records and Slip Productions will be doing a joint showcase during SXSW week. but here i am, working almost everyday of the first half of this month. Wtf, i think i was going to make a point to go to SXSW this year. There should be one statue given out next year - a 45-foot, sentient Oscar kill-bot, which Jason Statham will fight to the death at the next ceremony. On April 20th, rescind all the voting categories. CRANK 2: HIGH VOLTAGE comes out April 19th.
I wanted to say hello, but he seemed like he could chuck an arugula leaf through my skull.ĭo yourselves a favor, Academy voters.
Statham! Full disclosure: I saw Jason Statham eating a salad at Joan's on 3rd, here in L.A. THE WRESTLER: Jason Statham, Richard Nixon, the 'roided-out Benjamin Button murder-freak, the Churchill feces-baby and Mickey Rourke drive cross country in a limo, with Leo DiCaprio's severed head on the hood, where they crash the Spirit Awards and kill everyone.
REVOLUTIONARY ROAD: Jason Statham drives an 18-wheeler full of nitro into the title suburb, blows everything to shit, and then spends 90 minutes hunting down absolutely everyone involved with the making of this film, beating them to death with TV trays. THE READER: Statham kills the teenage kid with a lawnmower, then fucks Kate Winslet literate. GRAN TORINO: Jason Statham glowers at Clint Eastwood, who glowers back, creating a Glower Vortex which destroys the planet. Here we go:ĬHANGELING: Jason Statham plays the kidnapped boy, who immediately beats his kidnappers to death, then fights female assassins on top of a blimp.ĬURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON: Jason Statham injects the backward-aging man-freak with a Sino/Chilean rage compound, and they fight in lava pit.ĭEFIANCE: Jason Statham throws Hitler into a woodchipper, eats the entrails as they fly out the other end, and then shits out Winston Churchill.ĭOUBT: Jason Statham drop-kicks the Pope through the core of the Earth, and the Pope's head goes up Meryl Streep's ass and then Motorhead's "The Ace of Spades" plays.įROST/NIXON: Jason Statham pulls off David Frost's skin, drops him into a tank of sea salt, and then Statham and Nixon rent a limo and drive across country, shotgunning hippies. In fact, my entire stack of Academy screeners would have been vastly improved by the addition of Jason Statham. And if the script doesn't make him want to drive a bulldozer through a cake store, I'll bet he punches the script through a wall. But I get the impression that he reads the scripts. I don't know how much say he has in the films he makes. I look forward to any new film by Ang Lee, David Gordon Green, Paul Thomas Anderson, The Coen Brothers, Paul Greengrass or Ross McElwee.Īnd now, Jason Statham.
If someone figures out how to make a movie for $8, and it stars Jason Statham, then they're guaranteed a $2 profit. Statham can count on my $10 every time he makes a movie.
I'm buying THE BANK JOB and DEATHRACE on iTunes today. I just watched CRANK on Showtime, and I can't understand how I missed this when it was in theaters. But if you give me $10, I will fuck an explosion while a Slayer song plays". You won't learn shit about the human condition, or feel a collective connection with the brotherhood of man. It's a promise that says, "I promise that you will not FOR ONE SECOND be bored during one of my movies. Statham's profile, collectively, is a promise to you, the weary filmgoer. Jason Statham has never been in a great movie. Taken from the Patton Oswalt myspace blog.